- "''ROLF WILL RELEASE HIS RAGE NOW''"
- ―Rolf before doing just that upon his victim
Rolf is a fucking maniac who needs to be thrown in an asylum or something. Think of like, The Baseball Guy without all the baseball.
One day Rolf decided to get revenge on someone with his pal Kevin. They chose Eddy for enjoying his victory. Rolf had challenged Eddy to a duel and demanded Kevin to get him the Ed-boy. They had an intense battle and Rolf utterly destroyed Eddy with the fish of ultimate destruction and factual evidence and then Eddy was all liek "EEEUUUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH" like Zerostyle and Rolf came out victorious until a certain someone decided to step in. However, Rolf released his rage and punished the mysterious foo's with eels or something I don't fucking know.
Later he assaulted Demoman when he was just walkin' da cal-de-sac and encountered him and challenged that guy to a duel as well and once again came out as victorious. However he then encountered his arch-nemesis Double D who he had grown an undying hatred for after he cursed his raspberries to the life of salad dressing.
Meanwhile, Aya was taking pictures of him for da news article. But Rolf would have none of that, responding with "ARE YOU STEALING ROLF'S SOUL WITH YOUR FILMBOX" and then it turned out that Aya was actually Double D the whole time and fucking beat the shit out of him as usual but then Aya disguised again because she was a master of disguise and had somehow defeated Rolf and saved the cul-de-sac.
YOU HAVE MADE A MARY ANDREW OF ROLF, FOR THIS YOU MUST-
YOU ARE NOT ED
YOU HAVE CURSED MY RASPBERRIES TO THE LIFE OF SALAD DRESSING
BRING ME THE ED-BOY
ROLF WILL RELEASE HIS RAGE NOWEdit
YOU HAVE VANDALIZED ROLF'S FACE, AND YOU HAVE-
AND YOU HAVE STOLEN ROLF'S CHICKENS YET AGAIN
ARE YOU STEALING ROLF'S SOUL WITH YOUR FILMBOX?
THE BURDEN OF HOSPITALITY IS TOO GREAT FOR ROLFEdit
Thank you Kevin, but you are a nincompoop, AS THE COIN IS MINE
WEASEL IN A HENHOUSE ED-BOY
YOU DARE CHEAT ROLF OF HIS FRONT POST POSITION?